Everyone is obsessed with self-care! It’s an epidemic! But the reason why we are all so fascinated with this concept is that we undervalue ourselves.
It is only natural to become entranced by this all-solving concept. Especially, when you have trouble assigning value to yourself. Did I hit a sore spot?
We give everyone priority but ourselves. We assign worth to everyone but ourselves. It is no wonder why we burn out easy and stress easily and depress easily. We need self-care because we do not care for ourselves.
There is no priority given so we need to assign a special name to it and a specific time to do it.
You need to pour into yourself before you pour into others. You keep on pouring into others. But you forgot to refill. So, what are you pouring? Droplets. Is that worth anything to those you are helping if you have no energy?
What Causes this Self-Care Obsession?
We are in the time of entrepreneurs/ solopreneurs. The gig economy is booming. No longer are you guaranteed a good job straight out of graduation.
You are getting paid but you have these loans. You need to find a place to live. Your side gig driving for Lyft gives you some money but some days it’s not worth all the time it takes.
You are definitely making under minimum wage when all the fees come out. But you need to pay rent, loans, and eat. You need to show the world you are not lazy.
After you’ve worked so hard, the only time you have left is for chores. Then you have responsibilities to family and friends. The last person who gets your time is you.
When you do have time, it never feels enough. You have no time so now you have to schedule it in. It’s called self-care.
It’s a whole industry now because we’ve forgotten about ourselves. We need a reminder to drink our favorite teas in peace. A reminder to join a soccer team again because we love the endorphin rush. And a reminder to sleep because its important.
How to Stop the Self-Care Obsession?
So, how do we stop this pandemic? Well, the self-care industry is not wrong. We need to schedule a time for ourselves.
Because at this rate, thinking about our own needs is not natural for us anymore. We put our work first, friends first, family first all day every day. And sometimes they do need to come first. But not all the time.
Sometimes you need to be the first person that you satisfy. But to create a habit, you need to do it consciously first.
Just start with 5 minutes, just for you. It could be at the very beginning of the day or the very end of the day. Do whatever makes you happy.
If that’s reading, then read. If that’s listening to music do it. Do it and schedule it every day until it becomes a habit.
Make showering a habit. Make eating to take care of yourself a habit. Make sleeping a habit. Then, self-care no longer becomes an obsession because it’s something you do every day.
You burned out because you forgot about yourself. There is only so much your mind can take of just going without rest.
Then, you try to plaster a band-aid on with self-care. Tea and scented candles will not do anything for the months of damage you’ve been putting on your body.
And you wonder why self-care doesn’t work for you. It worked for everyone else. You need to instill the habits while you are still feeling okay.
Restoration should be a continuous process. You should constantly be restoring yourself in some way.
This is the only way your to-do list will stop seeming endless. And you will actually help the people you want to help because you have the energy to do so.
In order to have energy, you need to pay attention to yourself. What are your triggers? What stresses you out? How do you relax? How often are you stressed? What makes you happy? What makes you angry?
Figure all those things out. Use that information to create a lifestyle for yourself that is continuously restorative and non-toxic. Uncertainty makes you anxious.
Don’t just live in uncertainty. Make an effort to get certainty. Plan out your days. Email your boss to get plans for the day.
Tea calms you down. Take a 5-minute break and just drink tea. Don’t think about anything. Just drink tea. Write your worries down and save them for later.
These are the things that people have forgotten to do in the chaos that is today. There is so much going on that it’s difficult to think about our needs.
We even feel guilty for needing to refuel. You are not a robot. If you take a break, you may just come back being more efficient.
But you need to incorporate self-care behaviors throughout your week. So that you don’t crash in a month and wonder why your one attempt at self-care never worked. Self-care is not an instantaneous fix.
It is a slow and continuous journey that should be happening all through life. It is an obsession because we forgot about it.
It is the proper excuse to take care of ourselves like we should have been doing all along. That is the real reason why people are obsessed with self-care.
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